The Primal Wound Understanding the Adopted Child

A little truth about searching

I ran across an interesting poem. It captures how searching for your birth family can easily consume you. I must admit, it happened to me.

Adoption and Reunion
© Bob

Adoption and reunion

The longer this goes.

The more research that I do.

The more I think about it.

The more I read blogs and forums.

The weirder I get.

Why?

My mind gets no break from it.

I don't do anything that brings me satisfaction and pride.

I accomplish nothing.

I am in my own world, and have effectively evicted everyone close to me from it.

The more I read and listen, the worse I feel about it, the bigger the problem becomes.

I think everyone is against me, except those on the forums and blogs that I visit.

I used to have a lover.......... a family.......... and friends.

Oh, for the joy and pride my spouse and children have brought me.

Those people used to make me feel whole.

Think back........... was it always this big of a problem?

No.

Did I really always feel this bad?

No.

Do I want adoption to have impacted this child this badly?

No.

What am I doing to myself?

What am I doing to those who love me?

How did those people I loved become so unimportant?

This isn't a result of adoption.

I am responsible.

I have created this.

Adoption and Reunion by Bob from http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/

Why are our identities a state secret?

Search and Reunion Etiquette

http://www.americanadoptioncongress.org/search_byrne_article.php

Why Reunions Go Wrong:

WHAT MEMOIRS OF ADOPTED DAUGHTERS TELL MOTHERS